FoP: One RPG To Rule Them All

So you like D&D? Then you're a retarded SUCKER! Seriously, what about all that shit 'bout crawling into dungeons, killing monsters and taking their stuff, playing some pathetic kind of fairy shit like elves or dwarves? What's wrong with you?! I mean, this kind of shit doesn't even EXIST in real world.

I think it's about time I tell you what kind of goat-fuckers you all are.

Want to really play a serious, truly realistic Roleplaying Game? Then you should check out FoP!

FoP Sixth Edition

Written by David Halliday and playtested for about 300 years (just to end up discovering that the rules were all bugged anyway), FoP is the DEFINITIVE RPG. Want to hit something with your axe? Let the system solve it! Contained in this book are all the needed variables: air resistance, g force, even electroweak force! You won't have to bother anymore with players fooling around with missile ranges! Or falling damage! Fuck, even items saving throws!!! And when you reach Name Level, you can skip to the Advanced Edition:

TPoQM, Fourth Edition

Also included are rules to create your own Universe, from the Very Beginning to its Most Presumable End!! Why are you still fucking with D&D for god's sake!!!! YOU SHIT EATERS!!! YOU FUCKING DOUCHEBAGS!!! HOW CAN YOU BE SO MOTHERFUCKINGLY ASSHOLE?!???!!!

Dedicated to all the assholes who still debate about realism in Fantasy RPGs, and to a newborn troll in particular (I'm not linking his shit because of the "No Troll Feeding" policy of this playground. And remember: "Any time you try to chuck real physics into Roleplaying Games, Thor kills a catgirl. Think of the catgirls."